We have finalized the plans for Barry's funeral service. The funeral will be Thursday, August 6th and will begin at 11am. The service will be held at Trinity Church in Livermore. Their address is 557 Olivina Ave., Livermore. We remember it as the church by the Old Spaceship Park.
The service will be immediately followed by a reception in the church gymnasium. You will have the opportunity to leave notes for the family during the reception. If you have a special message or story that you would like to share during the funeral service, please email me directly glenriggslv@gmail.com so that we can try to accommodate everyone.
In lieu of flowers, please make a donation in Memory of Barry Riggs to Hope Hospice. They were truly instrumental in helping us through this process. You can donate on their website, HOPE HOSPICE and donation envelopes will be available at the service.
Thank you all again for your love and support!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Sunday, July 26, 2009
He will be missed
It is with heavy hearts that we publish this entry this morning. Barry is no longer fighting cancer. He had a very rough week last week and a very trying weekend. He spent most of Friday and Saturday sharing smiles and laughter with all of us. We have seen more smiles in the last few days than in the last month. He passed away peacefully in his sleep very early Sunday morning.
We thank everyone for all of your prayers and thoughts as we gather ourselves over the next few days. I will post memorial service information when it is available.
Love The Barry Riggs Family
Monday, July 20, 2009
Speechless...
Speechless...we use that term a lot in our lives, but how many times have we actually felt that way? I mean REALLY been speechless? We usually manage to mutter something...I'm Sorry...I didn't know that...etc. But since we have been faced with battling this horrible disease, I find that I am speechless more and more.
Many times I am afraid if I talk, then the strength I am using to fight back the tears will disappear, and I will cry. Not that I am afraid to cry, it feels really good sometimes; I just know that crying is contagious and I don't want Dad to catch it. So, I usually just sit speechless, and he loves the company. Sometimes just holding his hand gives him great comfort. A smile and a wink from across the room will almost always result in a returned smile and wink. Saying, "I Love You" will always get the same phrase returned.
We have called in Hope Hospice after Barry spent 10 days in the hospital for the same lung procedure, this time on the right lung. He has fought a very strong battle and we are all so very proud of his strength. This was a decision that he made with the blessing of his wife, parents, children, and friends. What this means is that our focus has changed from fighting cancer to enjoying the time that remains. This means that nurses and aides come to the house. Trips to the doctors' offices are greatly reduced. We now switch from making him eat things to make him strong to letting him have ice cream for dinner. His time with us is limited. The cancer has begun to progress and we are making him as comfortable as possible with medication, oxygen, love, and laughter.
Visitors-We welcome visitors and telephone calls, but Barry isn't always up to either. We are now taking shifts at spending time with him all day. He is too weak to get out of bed by himself and needs help to just sit up. If you would like to visit, we ask that you call the day of. Please call the home number (925) 606-6352 and don't be offended if he doesn't feel like visitors. He spends most of the day laying in or on the bed in a t-shirt and boxer shorts...or less.
What to Say-Something to keep in mind is that Barry doesn't like to talk about cancer! Nobody REALLY likes to talk about cancer. Come prepared with a picture or a story that has fond memories for both of you. Talk about his kids! (That is my favorite topic!) Help him to remember times when he was healthy, strong, and laughed. There is nothing that makes me smile more than to see him smile. His laughs are harder to come by today, but even a giggle is enough to brighten the house for a whole day.
I can't even begin to describe how difficult it is to publish this posting. I have switched out the Relay slide show to the pictures of Dad throughout the years. In closing, I wanted to share a story with you.
I was sitting in the hospital last week when Dad was taking a nap. I was working at the foot of the bed. I noticed that his hands were moving as he slept and as I looked closer, his hands were busy. Not just the usual twitching and jerking, but he was really doing something. When he woke, I asked what he was working on in his sleep and he couldn't remember.
That night I awoke from a dream. In my dream I could see what Dad was dreaming...this was my superhero power...along with being able to see through some glass, but that is a different story. But I could see exactly what he was dreaming about. He was healthy and I was young. He had taken me out fishing on the banks of the Delta and I had gotten my fishing line tangled when I was trying to cast. His hands were so busy trying to untangle my fishing reel. All the while he was looking down at me and smiling. I felt bad that I had tangled the line, but he didn't seem the least bit bothered.
It gives me great comfort in knowing that these are the memories that I have of my Dad; even if fabricated in my own mind. I know that he will always look down at me with a smile and will always be there to untangle whatever mess I make.
I Love You All and Love You Dad!
Glen
Many times I am afraid if I talk, then the strength I am using to fight back the tears will disappear, and I will cry. Not that I am afraid to cry, it feels really good sometimes; I just know that crying is contagious and I don't want Dad to catch it. So, I usually just sit speechless, and he loves the company. Sometimes just holding his hand gives him great comfort. A smile and a wink from across the room will almost always result in a returned smile and wink. Saying, "I Love You" will always get the same phrase returned.
We have called in Hope Hospice after Barry spent 10 days in the hospital for the same lung procedure, this time on the right lung. He has fought a very strong battle and we are all so very proud of his strength. This was a decision that he made with the blessing of his wife, parents, children, and friends. What this means is that our focus has changed from fighting cancer to enjoying the time that remains. This means that nurses and aides come to the house. Trips to the doctors' offices are greatly reduced. We now switch from making him eat things to make him strong to letting him have ice cream for dinner. His time with us is limited. The cancer has begun to progress and we are making him as comfortable as possible with medication, oxygen, love, and laughter.
Visitors-We welcome visitors and telephone calls, but Barry isn't always up to either. We are now taking shifts at spending time with him all day. He is too weak to get out of bed by himself and needs help to just sit up. If you would like to visit, we ask that you call the day of. Please call the home number (925) 606-6352 and don't be offended if he doesn't feel like visitors. He spends most of the day laying in or on the bed in a t-shirt and boxer shorts...or less.
What to Say-Something to keep in mind is that Barry doesn't like to talk about cancer! Nobody REALLY likes to talk about cancer. Come prepared with a picture or a story that has fond memories for both of you. Talk about his kids! (That is my favorite topic!) Help him to remember times when he was healthy, strong, and laughed. There is nothing that makes me smile more than to see him smile. His laughs are harder to come by today, but even a giggle is enough to brighten the house for a whole day.
I can't even begin to describe how difficult it is to publish this posting. I have switched out the Relay slide show to the pictures of Dad throughout the years. In closing, I wanted to share a story with you.
I was sitting in the hospital last week when Dad was taking a nap. I was working at the foot of the bed. I noticed that his hands were moving as he slept and as I looked closer, his hands were busy. Not just the usual twitching and jerking, but he was really doing something. When he woke, I asked what he was working on in his sleep and he couldn't remember.
That night I awoke from a dream. In my dream I could see what Dad was dreaming...this was my superhero power...along with being able to see through some glass, but that is a different story. But I could see exactly what he was dreaming about. He was healthy and I was young. He had taken me out fishing on the banks of the Delta and I had gotten my fishing line tangled when I was trying to cast. His hands were so busy trying to untangle my fishing reel. All the while he was looking down at me and smiling. I felt bad that I had tangled the line, but he didn't seem the least bit bothered.
It gives me great comfort in knowing that these are the memories that I have of my Dad; even if fabricated in my own mind. I know that he will always look down at me with a smile and will always be there to untangle whatever mess I make.
I Love You All and Love You Dad!
Glen
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Your Emails
I am a bit behind on your emails, but please feel free to keep them coming. Barry and Shirley really enjoy reading them!
"Wow! What a lot of work and effort went into the Relay for Life walk. I cannot imagine walking in 104 degrees heat. I knew Don and Alice would participate and they both look great. The whole family deserves a lot of credit. I am glad that Barry did get to participate and rally his troops. Congratulations to everyone involved in Team BRAT!"
Barry's Aunt Winnie
"...You don't know how many times that I have thought back to the old days. We all had some great times (and some not so great). Here we are 30 years later and all grown up...Barry I am just so sorry that your health is what has brought me to e-mail you. Why didn't we do this along time ago. Glen and I have always enjoyed your company. I hope that today is a good day for you. I know just getting to say hello has made it a good day for me. Glen and I will have you and your family in our prayers. Please give our love to Glen, Staci and Dustin (not sure they will remember us) and to your wife Shirley. Glen if you would please let your Dad know that I am thinking of him."
Take care,
Connie (Gibson)
"This is Terri from Citibank, I just wanted to say hello and let you know that you and your family are in my prayers. I saw Shirley today and she was kind enough to give me one of your cards. I enjoyed seeing your family pictures. Well young man you take care of yourself and say hello to Shirley for me, it was nice seeing her."
God Bless You
Terri
"Just want you to know I'm pulling for you. I'm sorry to hear about illness, you're on my prayer list. Hope things are going ok. And may I say, from a person who was a caregiver for many years, Shirley if there is any way I can help let me know. I know when someone you love is ill you feel helpless.. the best thing to do is take care of yourself so you can be there for the one you love.
Taking care doesn't mean doing everything yourself.. it means ask for HELP."
I'm here,
Tina Chang (from Trinity)
"Wow! What a lot of work and effort went into the Relay for Life walk. I cannot imagine walking in 104 degrees heat. I knew Don and Alice would participate and they both look great. The whole family deserves a lot of credit. I am glad that Barry did get to participate and rally his troops. Congratulations to everyone involved in Team BRAT!"
Barry's Aunt Winnie
"...You don't know how many times that I have thought back to the old days. We all had some great times (and some not so great). Here we are 30 years later and all grown up...Barry I am just so sorry that your health is what has brought me to e-mail you. Why didn't we do this along time ago. Glen and I have always enjoyed your company. I hope that today is a good day for you. I know just getting to say hello has made it a good day for me. Glen and I will have you and your family in our prayers. Please give our love to Glen, Staci and Dustin (not sure they will remember us) and to your wife Shirley. Glen if you would please let your Dad know that I am thinking of him."
Take care,
Connie (Gibson)
"This is Terri from Citibank, I just wanted to say hello and let you know that you and your family are in my prayers. I saw Shirley today and she was kind enough to give me one of your cards. I enjoyed seeing your family pictures. Well young man you take care of yourself and say hello to Shirley for me, it was nice seeing her."
God Bless You
Terri
"Just want you to know I'm pulling for you. I'm sorry to hear about illness, you're on my prayer list. Hope things are going ok. And may I say, from a person who was a caregiver for many years, Shirley if there is any way I can help let me know. I know when someone you love is ill you feel helpless.. the best thing to do is take care of yourself so you can be there for the one you love.
Taking care doesn't mean doing everything yourself.. it means ask for HELP."
I'm here,
Tina Chang (from Trinity)
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